"Lead from your Heart."

Published on Oct 26, 2009 by in Coupleship, Relationships

ilg devotes this DL and bows to the immutable grace and strength of my Beloved Partner, the ‘great saint’ with whom live and love;
Joy “Ananda” Kilpatrick…
May All Beings Benefit From My Miniscule Progress To Be More Like Thee…

photo by WF Student Shawna Schwaub.

“Are you in Love?” the Teacher asked the Scientist.

“Yes,” came the reply.

“Then prove it.”


“The purpose of science is not to prove,

but rather probe.”

– Albert Einstein


It’s been two and a half years since Ananda and i have seen a movie.

That’s a big thing for a former professional movie and tv actress.

Then again, seeing the current crop of movies? Maybe not so much.

It’s been the same amount of time since A and i have been able to live the outdoor/camping lifestyle ilg intended for us when i ‘whisked’ Joy from Los Angeles to live with me among the sacred mountains and canyons of my Beloved Southwest.

As the saying goes, “The baby changes everything.”

Really, the only thing a baby changes is our pre-supposed personal dictates we’re so quick to superimpose upon Reality.

Neither Joy or myself are getting any quality sleep volume. Her, more than i. If ilg could produce milk from my massive pecs (hey, quit laughing! i’m speaking from an endurance athlete’s perspective!), then maybe i could ease some of the chronic sleeplessness from Joy. Last night, Joy was up at 2:30 am breastfeeding. She did not get back to sleep. I hear her now, downstairs, making breakfast for Dewa as i attempt to draw a Teaching for you from the depths of my own fatigue.

When God sent Dewa’s Soul into Joy’s belly,
i told Joy that, “I would not run away.”

Some of my past Motherhood lives have been made accessible to me through Meditation. So, I re-Member cellularly, Soul-fully, the spontaneous combustion of Self that occurs as a Mother.

  • We spent an hour on that fateful afternoon, 2 years and 8 months ago, crying.
  • Tears over our life as Partners Without Child that would NOT be lived in this lifetime.
  • Grieving over losing the genesis of our wonderful lifestyle of fun, focus, and frolic which shifts instantly into…well, something else, when a Conscious Couple chooses to become Conscious Parents.
  • Sobbing over the exhilaration of caring for the heart of a child and the uncertainty of doing so without ‘security’ and all the rest of the unknowns…especially as the Great Recession deepened as Joy’s belly expanded.
  • We doubted our ability to pull this off at our ‘old age’.

Joy and i committed to raising our Dewachen for Her first few years without babysitters, without Day Care (an oxymoron if i ever heard of one), without Pre-School.

We knew we would have to accomplish the above without access to Grandparents or other elders to help.

We knew we didn’t have a lot of tools in the shed;
Joy’s early years were spent largely without parents and like many, my pivotal early years are recollected from oceanic fighting, bickering, and a non-present (but of course hard-working) dad.

If you studied my DL on the 14th of this month,
the first thing that a Conscious Parent must, is number one; “Be There.”

So, regardless of how much money, career potential, or personal fun we’d lose, Joy and i made a commitment on that fateful afternoon; We’d Be There For Our Chi-ld. That would be our Karmic Work for the rest of our present incarnation. Now, for such a Selfish Couple of Yogi’s, this was Big. Huge.

If a couple does not agree on a shared goal, then there is no marriage – certificate or not. I’ve said, “We must fall in Love with the strength of our partner’s Practice before anything else…for it will be the strength of one’s Practice that accounts for the sacredness of shared lives to persevere.”

Those of you who know of my track record with partners, may snicker at this point (snickering is okay, however, it ain’t great for your karmic load, so be careful!). Yet, i remain friends with past Partners. We inspire each other as we continue along our unique Ways, our Souls gobbling up the delicious astral Teachings intended, perfectly, for our own trek to continue toward Enlightenment.

As a paltry Reverend,
all ilg does is do my best live up to that name; i focus on always ‘revering the End.’

As a paltry Partner,
all ilg does is do my best to live up to that name; i focus on playing my ‘Part‘ as nobly as possible…which – ask Ananda – is not very Noble much of the time these days! Fortunately, God knows Intent. In that, ilg trusts.

When a common goal among a Partner-ship has been lost sight of,
there is a possibility that goal may cease to exist.

That’s when the ‘ship‘ in the Partnership begins to fracture. It may – and that’s a BIG ‘may’ – it may be better for each Partner to go his or her own Ways than to keep fighting.

“Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves,
and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever
explaining things to them.”

photo; Dewa this week, by Ananda.

Having said that, if a Partnership has been Gifted a Soul in the form of a chi-ld? Ilg suggests REALLY adjusting and engaging skillful behavior – no matter how thick and forlorn it may seem at times. We must do so for the sake of our chi-ld(ren). That chi-ld is our Podium toward Enlightenment. So, we must take the curriculum as best, as nobly, as tenaciously, as elegantly as we are able.

Inevitably friction will arise among a Partnership.
This is Go(o)d.
As the saying goes, “The gem cannot be polished without friction.”
No race is fun without pain, obstacles, and suffering…right?
Same thing with Parenting and Partnership; it’s the Trials and Tears that truly make it such an unsurpassed Journey.

What makes aging Sacred is the Art within Heart.

And everyone knows just how painful a life is the life of a genuine Artist; we walk our EarthWalk without blinders on our Soul; our Hearts wide Open to all the suffering, the confusion, the fear, and the impeccable joys…
this is both a Great Blessing and a Curse.

We never call our Loved One a “Sweethead,” do we?

Of course not.

We call our Loved Ones, a “Sweetheart,” because only our hearts can be sweet, brave, and beautiful. Not our heads.

Our heads think. Our hearts feel.

How does that great line in The Little Prince go?…

“Here is my secret. It is very simple: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

The Teaching of this DL is an old one within the WF Path, taught to me ironically enough, by my first wife, Deborah;

“Lead from your Heart.”

The name for God in Tamil means,

“Go In.”

So today,
so this week; let’s make it our Practice to
“Go In”

Go In
to the difficulties,
the fatigue,
the forlorn feelings,
the highs,
the lows
See What’s In There…

and let us Cultivate the Sacred Joy from the Divine Wisdom
within each of us that KNOWS
beyond a shadow of a doubt;
that what we are experiencing,
the life we have Chosen,

get out there and Act Great.

Even if you don’t feel Great;
Act Great.

May we Realize our Highest Workout is Everywhere,

your feeble ilg

One Response to “"Lead from your Heart."”

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