Wholistic Fitness

“There is a good reason why there is a whole lot of ‘om’ in the word, ‘mom’!” – coach ilg. approaching now her first month of being a m(om) to an infant, my Beloved Ananda is shown above on the last day of shooting her Pre-Natal Yoga Video. Once you become a Conscious Parent, you realize that all of your Practice has led you toward being the best guardian of your child as you can be. However, nothing is guaranteed about parenthood or childhood.

Dear Coach,
What I’d like to work on is my relationship with my mother. I get so incredibly frustrated with her and I know that happens with all mom/child relationships but sometimes I cannot understand how we have the same blood. She is so unhealthy physically and mentally and is doing nothing about taking the steps to move in the healthy direction. All she does is complain about how she’ll be happy when… you know this saying.

Coach:
i can help.
first, Shishya; Know This:
your mother is not your Mother.
your Soul chose her as a Vehicle, along with your biologic father.
you get frustrated with her, because you do not yet know your True Self.
the only way to work on your relationship with your mother is to work on your
relationship with your True Self. that is what you are i are doing in our Online Studies.

Forgive your mother; over and over and over Again.
i promise you; she is only doing the Best She Can as your mom
given the Spiritual Tools that she was Taught by her Teacher(s).

this is what is sooooooo utterly important about cementing one’s own Practice
before EVER having a child. in a round about way, however, your mom is still Teaching you.

are you Listening?
are you Accepting?
are you Practicing your Yoga with her?
can’t you see that your mother is your Guru in drag?

i want you to re-read what i just wrote you 3x.
then apply it with your mom.
look beyond her familiar face to her spiritual face; which is the same as yours.
your mom is afraid. afraid of dying. afraid of you knowing that she is not a great mom…etc., etc.
see her suffering and cultivate compassion.

Student:
I know I have to have patience and embrace her for who she is.

Coach:
the sentence could also be written:
“i know i have to have patience and embrace myself for who i am.”

this is called the Tibetan Reflection Principle; see everyone as a mirror so that you are looking back at yourself constantly.

Student:
But it takes everything in my power to not snap at her.

Coach:
forgive yourself for your Anger Arising.
over and over and endlessly again.
Shishya; there is a ocean of difference between our feelings
and our actions. that is why i created the 4 WF Lifestyle Principles.
apply them with your mom:
when mom ‘triggers’ you;
use #1; Breath and Posture
then #2; Mindfulness
then #3; Appropriate Action,
then #4; Practice.

it works. every time. the 4 WF Lifestyle Principles create that priceless ingredient to serenity;
Inner Spaciousness.
the yogi then acts from Higher, Expansive Perspective instead of the predictable, undisciplined reactive mind.

Student:
For instance, we were talking about drinking water. When I asked her how much water she drinks she said, “I don’t drink water”. When I asked why she responded, “Do you know what fish DO in water?”. What kind of response is that? What fish do in water? So she does not drink water. ???

Coach:
LOL!!!!!!
oh my GOD!
that is sooooooooo utterly FUNNY!!!!!!!!!
LOL!!!!!
oh man, that is PRICELESS STUFF!
just appreciate her Generation and understand her Lack of Dharma Teachers and just roll with her ‘stuff’ okay?

Remember this WF Maxim;
“When you are in it, it’s a drama.
When you Rise Above it, it’s a comedy.”

that will save you many years of frustration with relationships of all sorts.

got it?

Student:
And she can’t understand why her back hurts and why her hips hurt. As soon as her kidneys begin to hurt then she will drink water, but then won’t drink anymore once her kidneys feel better. This is MY MOTHER. How does that make any sense?

Coach:
i love you!
classic stuff from that generation.
you ain’t gonna change your crazy mom just like i ain’t NEVER gonna change my crazy dad.

however, you CAN change your attitude and perspective toward THEM!

Student:
These are the kind of things that happen with her all the time, the same type of conversations all the time. Nonsense. It makes me angry and I don’t like it so I avoid her. I would like to have a relationship with her that does not bring this anger up in me so I can enjoy spending time with her.

Coach:
you apply what i have Taught you above and keep talking with me.
you are doing JUST fine and we’ll get you and your mom back to the Namaste Space in no time; you’ll see.